State of Jen and looking back to a year ago

Apparent is DONE!

Kinda.

It needs tons of revisions and I abandoned the ending when I realized that what I thought up didn’t work in the slightest. But now revisions start and I’m trying to work out the plot (to which I laugh at myself and think “PLOT?! What plot?!”). So plot-whispering. Outlining. Rewriting.

And outlining Half Passed.

I’m still not fully employed and I’ve been thinking a lot about my life a year ago today. I had a full-time job where, granted, I didn’t make a ton of money, but the people were nice and… Yeah. I mostly left so that I could be with my family while saving money that I’d otherwise spend on rent, groceries, and utilities. That plan has been less than successful since a year later, I’ve had 2 unpaid internships and no actual job. No money saved, alas.

The deciding factor for me in leaving was when I attended some Florida transportation conference and one speaker said something to the effect of this: “I remember when I started in transportation. Fresh out of college and thinking I’d be in transport for five years max. Here I am 20 years later!”

He went on to talk about how he, like most people didn’t realize the scope of the industry. Most of the attendees found it humorous.

I found it horrifying.

I envisioned myself trapped. And I thought “I don’t even want to be here for the next five years.”

I was gone within a month.

I’m mostly happy. I focus more on my writing and am immersed in the world of books and publishing but I have to admit that sometimes I wonder if I made the right decision. Things will work out, I’m sure.

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